Photo: Unidentified lady takes to her knees for a deep prayer Kenya
“I tried to drink and pray it away…”
By Lisa Marie P
I just returned home from having impromptu cocktails with one of my closest confidants when I accepted I want to share my recent truth.
Today I found myself saying a familiar saying I haven’t said in close to a decade… “This will be the last time you hear my voice a day in your life.”
Perhaps I should start from the beginning before I fast forward to the end. I received confirmation today that a man I thought I knew and loved was the father of a child I nor anyone else in his life has been aware of for “well over” a year. He made the choice for me, his loved ones, the mother of his child and most importantly, his child that this information was not worth the merit beyond the walls of his psyche and closely contained actions.
I am not perfect and am far from the poster woman of good decisions; however I have realized that the most selfish mistake an adult human can make in this lifetime is taking away the gift of choice from anyone, especially anyone who is regarded as a loved one.
Less than 12 hours has passed and this entire season as a whole has made all of the women in me tired from experiencing all of the seasons in a day. However, I had to share my truth as many of us have made this mistake in our lives to lesser degrees and not realized the impact of choice or influencing the lack thereof until a healthy dose of maturity and reality has smacked us in the face.
I also had to share the reinforced lesson of not ignoring the warning signs. We are all imperfect, yet “know” when we encounter the incomplete and should be ok with not wanting to fix nor help anyone find their wholeness. That should be something they should want for themselves or they will… hurt you and everyone else in their path in the process of identifying their identity when not affiliated to the sum of those they have encountered and those they want to be regarded among.
Hurt people indeed hurt people.
Protect your neck.
Love Always… minus the exception of “the sorry” as I am not sorry for sharing my truth.
-LM
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