Exposed: The four kinds of thieves notorious in Kenya; master thief, hungry thief, opportunistic thief, retired thief

Photo: DP Ruto enjoying a light moment with Kirinyaga governor Anne Waiguru- Waiganjo
By Mwangi Kibathi
I have realized there are so many kinds of thieves in this country.
There is a master thief, his only work is stealing. He may have some small part time job as a politician….just part time. He really doesn’t have an immediate use of what he is stealing. But people must remain busy. Right? Like a guy grabbing thousands of public plots and billions of shilling that he can’t finish this and life after.

Then there is the hungry thief, he steals for immediate need. These are the pick pocket guys and those who harvest our pumpkins in Endebbes or public officers who steal a few thousands.
The third thief is opportunistic thief, this one steals because an opportunity arose. He didn’t plan to steal when he left the house but then God ” blesses” him with an opportunity. See guys who loot bread or beer in scenes of accident or a leader who fakes milege claim or those who steal Bibles donated by Gedions at Sunshine hotel, Kericho.

Then there is a window shopping thief, a thief without opportunity to steal, the guy who salivates at stories of real thieves. This is like the senior opposition leader when he hears how many billions those in government are stealing or a lawyer who represents a bank robber in court…….or a junior accountant who fakes accounting documents on behalf of the boss then he is give a small tip.

The virtual thief neither benefits from what he steals nor hurts the victim. See the guy who keeps stealing FB posts and posts them like their own. They even add a line like…… today I woke up inspired……. Those who steal glances at you in meetings and public places also fall here. You look up, they are looking at you, they look down, then they steal another gaze, then another…..
Then there is a retired or reformed thief. He made his wealth from the stealing industry. But now he has ” seen the light” He speaks ill of thieves but holds onto what he stole….those many years ago.

What kind of of thief are you?