Banana Peddler: Kisii ladies pretend to forget Ekegusii & FAKE accent when they get to town

Date:

By Banana Peddler

Sometimes I take a walk around Nairobi but rarely come across beautiful Kisii girls. The only beautiful people I meet are the yellow yellow queens from Mt. Kenya and these other short and brown ones from Ukambani.

However, sometimes the Ukambani ones are deceptive because they hide years in their un-ageing tiny figures. You can meet a 47 years Mwende and think she is 19 years.

That one aside, where is these beautiful girls from my motherland if at all they exist? Do they stay indoors, the more reason why they miss the Bob Collymores of this world as their Kikuyu counterparts grab them like the world is ending tomorrow?

Ironically, if by God’s grace you happen to come across one, she will never let you know she is Kisii. Instead, she’ll struggle with her little Swahili and English.

Surely, babes ladies, is it crime for you to speak Ekegusii hapa town? Are you trying to show us that you are the best Swahili and English speaker yet you just came from the village the other day?

Above all, one thing I thank God for is that no matter how painstaking you try to fake that accent, Ekegusii evidently manifests from the background. Tiga obochinga mobwate ebisagane ebi. Yaani bono inwe mokeroche moono kobua babo Kenyambi simbiri aba bakonakonoga ekiabo nagotobekera emechere amaru ime batarigosoka?

Tiga obochinga mobwate ebisagane ebi. Yaani bono inwe mokeroche moono kobua babo Kenyambi simbiri aba bakonakonoga ekiabo nagotobekera emechere amaru ime batarigosoka?

Obonyonga obuo bobang’ainete amo nebimbere ebio, ao rende ntorore kaa ase mogokorera.

Tokwanere Ekegusii masombe ekero twomeranire. Omabiii, ochaga eyachire ebaombogani amachara aya. Chafu nadingi.

 

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here


Share post:

Subscribe

spot_imgspot_img

Popular

More like this
Related

Safaricom Ordered to Pay Sh1.4 Billion After Court Finds Telecom Giant Copied Teen Wallet Idea

Kenya’s corporate giant Safaricom PLC has suffered one of...

Co-op Bank Pushes Geothermal Financing Agenda at 2026 Energy Conference in Nakuru

Co-operative Bank of Kenya has reinforced its commitment to...

Aviator Mania Raises Tough Questions About Gambling Regulation in Kenya

Aviator Faces Growing Calls for Shutdown as Questions Mount...